I hacked apart my 6th Grade Declam piece (“The Rum Tum Tugger” by T.S. Elliot) and made it into an ode on teaching English in Korea.

Teaching English in Korea is a Curious Job:
If you teach they want a game.
If you don’t prepare they want a lesson,
If you make a lesson they change the chapter.
If you play a game then you should be teaching,
If you are asked a question nobody listens to the answer.
Yes teaching English in Korea is a Curious Job–
And there isn’t any call for me to shout it:
For we will do
As they do do
And there’s no doing anything about it!

Desk Warming is a terrible bore:
When you’re in all day, you want to be out;
You’re always on the wrong side of every door,
And as soon as you’re at home, then the MOE is at school.

Yes teaching English in Korea is a Curious Job–
And there isn’t any use for you to doubt it:
For we will do
As they do do
And there’s no doing anything about it!

The Korean co-teacher is a curious beast:
His disobliging ways are a matter of habit.
If you offer him help then he always says no;
When there isn’t any help then he won’t be quiet.
If you offer him advice then he sniffs and sneers,
For he only likes what he finds for himself;

So you’ll catch him in class saying something wrong,
If you already told him before.
Before you arrive you are artful and knowing,
The kids don’t care for a cuddle;
But they’ll leap on your lap in the middle of break time,
For there’s nothing they enjoy like a horrible muddle.
Yes teaching English in Korea is a Curious Job–
And there isn’t any need for me to spout it:
For we will do
As they do do
And theres no doing anything about it!

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